I want to study female ejaculation. There seems to be so much myth and controversy out there over if, how and what women ejaculate. To help correct this issue and to contribute to the scientific body of knowledge, I propose that I do some research on shejaculate. All I need to make my scientific contribution is about $200 000 of research money and 200 healthy college-aged females so that I can closely study their orgasms. The scientific study of female ejaculation is extremely important to me and I am willing to sacrifice my time and resources to make this happen.
I will, of course, require research assistants. Luckily I have Ashlie, Special K and Tai Chi to help
me gather female ejaculate. I will assume all 3 assistants will be more than happy to demonstrate how to squirt for the young college girls and to help them squirt.
Things that I will require to make this happen are funnels to collect the shejaculate, my lovely 3 assistants, 3 matching PVC nurse outfits, 200 hot and healthy college females between the ages of 18-21, a PVC lab coat, 5 sybians, sample collection jars, and some video cameras to record everything.
In order to make this a reliable study and to properly view and record the squirting incidents should they occur, it will be necessary to have all the of female participants completely shaved so that no hair is present to obscure the data.
- 10 HDPE Funnels
- 400 Glass sample containers
- 100mL and 250mL Graduated cylinders
- 10 Sybians
- 10 Hitachi Magic Wands
- 10 Rabbit Vibrators
- 5 Pink Cherry Vibrators
- Microparticle Enzyme Immunoassay Machine
- 10 Cameras
All participants will provide a urine sample which is clearly labeled.
To prevent any form of contamination, the girls will arrive completely shaved and be instructed to remove all of their clothing for the remainder of the experiment.
Cameras will be installed in all zones where girls are being milked in order to catch the shejaculation on tape.
In an attempt to guarantee that each of the girls cum and squirt, they shall be milked until they release their female ejaculation. Each of the assistants and I my attempted to cause the participant to squirt with each assistant taking turns to get her to cum. If she squirts a viable quantity of cum, it will be directed into a HDPE funnel which will collect the sample in a sample jar which will also be labeled.
Each sample of cum will be measured for volume in graduated cylinders.
Any female participant who was unable to female ejaculate and produce a female ejaculation sample will, under the supervision of one of the assistants, pee into a funnel and produce a post-orgasmic pee sample in place of her female ejaculate sample.
The cum shall be analyzed with a Microparticle Enzyme Immunoassay (MEIA) and compared with the sample of the preorgasmic urine. Each female squirt sample will be analyzed to detect PSA, using the Abbot AxSYM SYSTEM (1994, 1996), system and apparatus, and AxSYM PSA reactives, along with the glucose and fructose levels in the shejaculation sample.
The sample of urine produced earlier by the participants will be measured using the same MEIA techniques above.
Each assistant will cum at least once per hour during the analysis phase of this study.
The piss samples will be compared directly with the sample of female ejaculate.
The percentage of girls who were unable to squirt will be compared with the total number of participants and any girl who can’t squirt while riding a Sybian with a Hitachi on her clit while being worked over by a hot assistant clad in PVC probably can’t actually squirt. This should give us an accurate number as to what percentage of women can actually squirt.
The samples will be compared using the MEIA analysis to see if there are any significant differences in composition from the urine samples.