Evaluating a slave’s performance
Often slaves are the worst at evaluating their own performance. They tend to either wildly inflate their own awesomeness or undervalue themselves to the extreme. As a Dom, it’s important to give your submissive feedback on how she is serving, obeying and generally pleasing you. This can help keep her grounded while also being a tool to improve her performance. Clearly communicating your expectations and her performance at meeting those expectations is a key to fostering a positive BDSM relationship.
Let’s break down way I look a slave’s performance. Essentially, there are two key components to a slave’s performance: i) State of Mind and ii) Actions.
i) State of Mind:
This is ultimately the area I care most about. The mind and Mindset of a slave are so key to who she is as a person. If the slave is happy, horny and eager to serve then there is little she can do wrong because her mind is in the right place. I would much prefer a subbie who screws up frequently but is always horny and wanting to serve me with all her heart over a ‘technically perfect’ slave who is grumpy and going through the motions.
State of Mind may be broken into 3 categories:
- Mood (is she happy, sad, angry, frustrated etc.)
- Libido (how horny and sexually charged is she)
- Willingness (her desire to serve and please with every action)
As a Dom, you should give feedback to your subbie on her overall State of Mind and break it down for her so she knows where she excels and where she needs to improve. For example, Ashlie’s State of Mind is outstanding in Willingness — she is always wanting to serve with every breath and action and considers herself a slave in ever thought and action. So 10/10. Her mood, however, could be better as she has been fairly low energy of late and I have the feeling she could nap at any time. I would love to see her be happier and full of life. While she’s never angry and rarely grumpy, she can be PMSy and moody. Overall 6/10. Finally, Ashlie’s libido is pretty much outstanding. She is such a horny slut who would rather put on a masturbation show for me (to try and convince me to fuck her) than to do anything outside the house where fucking isn’t as easy. So 10/10 on that as well.
A Dom who gives feedback to his slave also gives her an opportunity to improve. Beyond that, frequently evaluating the slave’s performance also gives the Dom and opportunity to lay out in HIS mind what needs to be improved so that he can map a route to get there.
You can achieve a goal you don’t have.
Actions are the physical tasks and efforts performed under the command of the Dom. This can be from presenting up to the Dom’s standards when she enters the room to more generalized ideas such as ‘never be late’ or ‘weigh under 120lbs.’ This is the physical side of the coin as compared with the mental ‘state of mind.’
Actions may be broken down into:
- Extra Mile
Completeness is the slave’s ability to remember all components and tasks assigned to her and actually attempting to perform them all. If a Dom has standing orders that are always in place — the slave must strive to achieve them all. If she completely forgets about some tasks — her completeness needs a lot of work. Also falling into this category is actual completeness…did she finish the tasks assigned or just start them?
Accuracy is the submissive’s ability to follow the details of your instructions and performing each task up to the standards required of her. If you teach her a position and then have her assume that position…is that position perfect? (Is her posture exactly as you require? etc.) If you told her to gather the dishes and wash them by hand, i) did she get them all? ii) did she wash every dish? iii) is each dish spotless and clean? iv) did she dry them and put them away?
Timelines is the slave’s ability to promptly perform a task. This is anything to do with time: Can the slave do the task quickly as well as accurately? Did the task get done promptly after it was requested? Did she lose 5 lbs in the 2 weeks you gave her to do it? Did she ever show up late and make you wait?
Extra Mile. This is a category that basically says, I want my slave to surprise me by how well she is looking out for me. Does she not only do what I ask but also do extra things for me that I need? This show eagerness to serve like nothing else. For example, I meet Ashlie and she has a bottle of hard liquor, a plate of healthy food and wearing a new latex outfit — when all I said is, ‘I want you to be ready to meet me at 6 p.m.’ She clearly has gone the extra mile to serve me — I look at these as the bonus marks of the BDSM world.
A Master may give detailed goals and actions for his slave to perform and then use these orders to evaluate the slave’s performance. He may break it down for her: I asked for X and you did x and a bit of y. A Master may use any of his senses to evaluate the slave’s performance but she will never know unless he tells her. She may be thinking she’s doing great while you are frustrated with her for being such a fuck up. This disconnect can only be addressed through communication and further instructions.
Now I realize that a Master is not a mind reader and cannot fully evaluate a slave’s State of Mind. He can infer her mindset from her speech, body language and performance but he can’t know her emotions and the thoughts bouncing around in her head. So what can you do?
A Master may elect to write down specific rules and goals for his slave so that she may review them and both can look at how she is advancing towards the goals. It is also possible to give the slave detailed question sheets to fill out or even to keep a diary so that the Master has better access to her thoughts. The main purpose being: the Master should be guiding the submissive to be the best person that she can be — and use goals and evaluating her performance as tools to achieve the best possible slave.
Note: When I say ‘best possible slave’ I mean ‘best possible person’. My goal as a Master is to always leave a slave better off than when I found her and improve her life and herself in every way I can.
The best way for a slave to improve is to have clearly defined goals and responsibilities for her to perform — and she should know that her Master is watching her carefully and assessing her performance.