You might be a masochist

*Note: Read this in the tone of Jeff Foxworthy saying, “you might be a redneck.”

bent-over-backwardsIf someone plays with your hair and you wish they’d just pull it hard…you might be a masochist.

If going to hardware store gets you excited by all the evil sex toys there…you might be a masochist.

If someone nibbles on your ear and you’d prefer them clamping so purple teeth marks appear…you might be a masochist.

If pain triples the intensity of your orgasm…you might be a masochist.

If you sleep better when rolling over makes new parts hurt…you naked-skinny-slavegirlmight be a masochist.

If you love the way fingernails leave red trails across your skin…you might be a masochist.

If you have more than 5 friends that live in Antarctica… you might be a masochist.

If it hurts to sit in your chair every Monday morning…you might be a masochist.

If bruises on your skin remind you of fun playtime…you might be a masochist.

mom-cant-cum

If hearing, “I’m going to fucking hurt you bitch” makes you instantly wet…you might be a masochist.

If you admire your bruises in the bathroom mirror…you might be a masochist.

If you tell someone you are tied up and you are literally tied up…you might be a masochist.

If getting ready for a party means getting rid of 90% of your clothes…you might be a masochist.

If yellow bruises upset you because they aren’t a pretty shade of purple…you might be a masochist.

skinny-naked-slave

 

If your ideal ‘great night’ is being bound and gagged in a dungeon….you might be a masochist.

 

If your primary concern when buying candles is the temperature the wax melts…you might be a masochist.

 

If your idea of really comfortable heels is 6 inch heels…you might be a masochist.

If you prefer most cooking utensils being used on you rather than for cooking…you might be a masochist.

If your thought on seeing any clamp is, ‘how will that feel on my nipples?”…you just might be a masochist.

Leave a Reply