Polyamory is NOT Swinging

See the smiles? That’s the most important part!

When I say that I am polyamous, people (aka girls) often respond poorly –so I want to clarify. I am polyamorous — with a big emphasis on amorous!  While I am capable of having more than one lover at a time…and I am completely comfortable with having more than one lover in my bed at the same time — I am not comfortable with casual sex. I just don’t like it.

If I am going to sleep with someone…it is because I really like them and want to sleep with them over and over again.  I like having multiple loving, long term stable relationships. I don’t think sleeping with someone just once is a good idea…it’s terrible in fact.  Well, I have slept with a friend  and it WAS terrible and I didn’t want to repeat the experience… we stayed friends and I now she felt bad that we seemed so utterly incompatible.  It was like I was Lego and she was Blocko (I think those don’t actually fit together…I’m not exactly down with Blocko at all).

If I connect with someone — really connect — I tend to want to connect on a sexual level. If we have chemistry and attraction then making someone that I care about happy and orgasmic is the best ever. If I don’t know you at all and we just met…you have to be pretty fucking amazing on a lot of levels before I will want to jump into bed with you the first time we meet. Mostly…I have to get  to know you be sure that I like you.  Perhaps it is because I have other relationships that I am not simply going to throw down a ‘fun fuck’ as I can do that pretty easily.

Think about an orgy…if I don’t know at least a couple people there — there is no way I am into just fucking someone on a physical level. I just don’t feel like doing that.  I prefer not to.  But it’s not that I am opposed to orgies. I really like sleeping with multiple people at once (and I’m good at it too!)  But an orgy of close lovers is the best thing in the world to me. It is so rare and precious and awesome! And once you’ve had that…then why would you settle for having sex with some meaningless randos? No, that is what Swinging is all about — and I am NOT a swinger. Sorry, I just can’t and won’t separate sex from emotion.

Life is short and it needs to be filled with love — and not meaningless sex.

One Response

  1. Anonymous December 24, 2015

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