On Defilement

magic-wand-slaveDefilement is a frequent theme in BDSM related sex but what it is really all about? Defilement might include activities that denigrate and degrade your partner during sex for erotic pleasure.  Common activities include spitting on their face, hair pulling, pissing on them, scratching them, insulting them with coarse language and even forcing them to drink your piss and then puke it up all over themselves.   An uninitiated lover may think this behavor completely horrifying and disrespectful of all feminist ideals…but what is really going on here?

Defilement is not about lack of respect for your partner but rather a desire to be fully oneself with your partner: free to do anything at all that the rest of society frowns upon but your lover accepts you fully and because of that acceptance: the two of you form a deep bond of trust and understanding.  And deep bonds of trust and understanding are ultimately what good sex is all about.