What is love? I am probably the first guy to ask that question yet it is worth further consideration. Love is a primal need within all of us. The need to connect with another – or so we think. But I believe it is so much more than that. Of course, many view love through the lens of universal love: of a Godlike love for all things or a connection to the very energy the permeates the fabric of reality. Many consider love as purely intangible – unknowable and untouchable. And that is where I differ from them.
Love, to me, is the feeling you get in the center of your chest – but not just a ‘feeling’ caused by releasing chemicals and hormones that give us pleasurable emotions that cause us to have sexual urges so that the species will continue…that is far too scientific without any heart at all. No, love is not a series of hormonal releases that influence our thoughts. Love is connecting to energy that permeates reality through our energy system.
According to ancient wisdom and texts – as well as my own personal experience – I know that the body is maintained by 7 swirling vortices of energy called chakras. I can feel each of them and they feel incredibly different from one another. They let me know if an aspect of my life is in or out of balance. Not coincidentally, the chakra right smack in the middle of my chest, right near my actual heart (but more centered) is the 4th chakra. The Heart Chakra.
For those scientifically-minded folks out there, you are probably rolling your eyes. Before you write me off as a complete hippy flake, know that I can easily name my 10 favorite scientists (granted, they are mostly physicists) and my number 1 spot is Dr. David Bohm of Bohmian mechanics – and I can show you how Schrodinger’s equation was originally derived. I think like a scientist but I don’t see how it is logical to disregard my own experience and feelings of chakras simply because you have not figured out how to measure them. Yet.
The chakra system is an ancient one and was described by Hindus and Buddhists in great detail – and I would like you to consider that perhaps, just maybe, they actually know what they are talking about. Perhaps they are even describing something real.
And the heart chakra feels very real to me. I can feel it when it opens – I can feel the energy flowing through my chest and invigorating me. When I breathe deeply while thinking of a loved one, sometimes I can feel the chakra opening and expanding. As it opens, the energy pours in and in feels so damn amazing that people describe the feeling as ‘love.’
The connection to others is one of the easiest and most natural ways to get this chakra to open. In truth, when one falls in love with another, the chakras of each love merge together and help open each other. Lovers instinctively face each other, heart to heart…hug each other…and allow their hearts to merge together as one.
This, in all its simplicity, is love.
Love however, does not require another. It is possible to open your own heart chakra. To meditate on loving yourself. In my experience, the feeling works but it less profound and enduring than connecting with your lover.
One can open up and connect to the entire universe — and this feeling can cause full on love-orgasms in the heart. This universal love connection is intensely profound…but I have found no way of sustaining it! Feeling the energy of everything flow through you is profound and life-changing…and yet, there still is a desire within me to connect to a lover.
Connecting to a lover through my heart is an act of bravery. Why bravery? Because nothing in the world hurts as much as having your heart broken. It can crush your very soul and reduce you to a burnt ash that simply fades out of existence. Exposing this most precious part of myself – my very heart – to a love and letting her hold it – knowing that she can hurt me more than anyone on the planet by simply betraying my love – well, it seems almost stupid to consider doing such things…at least from a logical point of view.
Yet in recent days, I feel compelled to open my heart to my beloved Pumpkin –to finally let her in. I have just cracked the door open and feel like I am peeking through – still a bit too terrified to enter…and yet there is a feeling…a knowing…that on the other side of the door is a universal love that I long to connect with. A love that is not based on here, in the physical world. It is a love that was decided before either of us took a human body and form. A love that will continue on, beyond this lifetime. A love that will dance and grow as we play within the realms of physical existence.
And yet, through all of that magical connection, I worry that perhaps I am just deluding myself – that my heart is conspiring against me so that it can fulfill its need to be broken once again. Yet life is too short to not live it to the fullest. To not dive into the pool and risk everything just to feel alive. So I will slowly open that door – I know I don’t have all the time in the world but still, such things of monumental importance should be approached cautiously…at least, that is what my experience, my painful experiences, has taught me.
Yet ultimately I have no choice but to follow the path with heart.