Struggling with Celibacy and opening my Heart Chakra

The celibacy thing is going ok. I knew this was coming (and I wouldn’t be!) so I suppose my mental preparation paid off. I have been meditating a fair bit (and especially on getting my energy flowing and opening up my heart chakra), eating mostly fruits, veggies and nuts, with dried fruits as my sweet treat. Still, all of this preparation and celibacy for the spiritual retreat in Peru is intense. But in the end, it will be worth it?

Struggling with Celibacy and opening my Heart Chakra 1

Been doing some chakra meditation where I breath up and down my central core, flexing over key energy centers… Inhale up to the middle, exhale rising up and out the top of the head… Then inhale down to the chest, exhale out through my belly and down through my root chakra.
A couple of key insights. The top chakra (7th) it is helpful to envision it about 6 inches above the top of my head. Secondly, I am finding the deep breathing where I inhale through my belly and it extends way outward… Very useful.

I feel that I am energizing my energy body and making my overall energy density much thicker. And it feels good.
Had an interesting experience about a half hour ago, breathing and doing this chakra work… My mind went totally quiet and I became conscious of the vibrations around me.

As I walked through the unit, I stayed in a deeply meditative state and felt the vibration of the entire unit. And knew that I could keep it running well with intention and working with it energetically.

But before that, I need to get my body running perfectly energetically. Perhaps practice morphing it a bit so my stomach has flat abs, I grow a couple of inches and my chest and arms get stronger. Pumpkin resists this because she doesn’t remember that we are ultimately spiritual being in a spiritual playground and made entirely of light and energy. The energy responds to our thoughts and prayers.

Ultimately everything is all one. Undivided. A giant flowing movement of perfection. The embodiment of God. All is one and by extension, we are literally God…there is no separation.

And so… We are heading into wonderful, creative times.
Oh, and I had the sense that I was bleeding off a boatload of energy sexually… Focusing my attention outward instead of inward – and losing lots of energy that way. And then losing tons of it during outwardly focused orgasms.

I need to work on that. On Tantric sex connections and using orgasms as transformative events that are like powerful prayers for creating our reality.

I am so looking forward to this retreat in Peru as it is in a very powerful place, high in the mountains of the Sacred Valley, a short walk away from a powerful world energy centre with a temple on it. It is like the pyramid of Giza… But the Peruvian version… And I will be doing energy work with 2 Amazonian shamans to transform myself!
So excited!

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